It's all energy.
1. We are born as blank slates and are programmed by others.
2. Many people aren't aware that they are total programming and never deeply question where their beliefs and perceptions come from.
3. Many people aren't aware they are projecting that programming into the world around them all the time including on to friends, family members, lovers etc.
4. For relationships(of any kind) to truly work people would have to realize they are programmed and are projecting. And ideally the programming and projections would want to be aligned or at least given freedom to be.
5. Many people are taking on other peoples programs and projections as their own without conscious and subconscious awareness or questions what their own hearts desire is.
6. Few people are doing their own deep internal work to see and understand their own stuff and other people's stuff programmed into them or what they are projecting onto other people.
7. The heart knows the truth, but few people go there.
8. Even what I am writing is projection and it will align with some and not align with others. It's all energy.
Your mind(subconscious is most powerful) creates a holographic image of all your wants, desires, dreams, hopes and then that is many times projected onto someone else. This includes the love you think you need from someone else( it comes from you.).
The subconscious mind also includes your unresolved pain, suffering, insecurities and unresolved emotional and mental trauma and that too gets projected.
So when two people come together most of the time it is their subconscious minds interacting and projection onto the other person. Some of it can be great but if someone else's dreams/hopes etc aren't your own then what? And vice versa.
True awareness is watching your own mind and being able to see if you are projecting. True relationship awareness is each person doing their own inner work to see if their projections are aligned and if their subconscious minds are being healed of the unresolved stuff. This can create stress and pain in the body if the person isn't unaware of what is causing them pain and stress.
If you aren't aware you could be taking on someone else's holographic projection as your own. Which might seem okay if you have some similar hopes and dreams. But most of times it creates more muck. This also includes taking on the stuff stored in each others subconscious mind that is not resolved.
But mostly it's this entanglement of energy without true inner awareness of the moment and moving through life finding the pockets of who you are. Are you following your own heart or being pulled by someone's else's projections?
The love is already within and sometimes the layers of unresolved stuff don't let other people see that within themselves.
It is that love within that is a massage of the body, because the mind runs through the whole body. That is what yoga teaches as well.